Adapted from an image by Dan Cook
Have a Can-Do Attitude: Make ‘Never’ the Only Option
When my wife and I were engaged, she was living in Atlanta and I was living in Birmingham. She started interviewing two months before our wedding for a job in Birmingham, and she found one pretty quickly. The only problem: They wanted her to start right away.
At first, I didn’t realize that was a problem. Our wedding was just a few months away, so I figured she would go ahead and move in with me and begin her new job. But then Susan said the only way we were going to do that is if she had a wedding band firmly on her finger. She said: “We’re not going to get this out of order.”
Two weeks later, I picked Susan up in Atlanta and we drove to Augusta, eloping to be married by her childhood pastor. As expected, even with an elopement, he wanted to do some premarital counseling before the ceremony, and he got right to the point. He said, “You can never let divorce be an option. Never! Are you ready to make that promise?”
I’d only known this man for about 15 minutes, but I realized I was going to have to make that promise or I would be dropping my fiancée off at her Atlanta apartment and driving back to Birmingham alone.
So we made that promise to each other that day, knowing it was one we had to keep. And over the years, when we’ve had disagreements, Reverend Bob Gillespie’s words have always come back to me. “Never!” So with limited options, we always worked things out.
The Power of Persistence
Sometimes—especially when options are limited, by your own doing or by circumstances—working something out (or making something work) is hard. It can be really hard! But usually, that’s much better in the long run than simply giving up when things get tough.
What if we apply that can-do, will-do attitude to all of the big decisions we have to make?
I’ve heard too many times about companies hiring “superstar” employees who underachieve before settling in, and the first inclination is to let them go. That scenario could be played out in multiple areas of our work and life. How often are we too quick to give up on people—from employees to team leaders to key vendors to friends to ministers—when they disappoint us?
And it doesn’t just apply to people. We give up on lots of things all the time—new systems at work, healthy exercise and eating habits, daily devotionals—much more quickly than we should do.
Giving up and moving on often is the easier thing to do. Sometimes it is the right thing to do—but only after careful thought and a focused, honest effort to make the situation work.
Next time you’re facing a big, tough decision, tell yourself that giving up is not an option. Make that vow to yourself. Then work—really work—at whatever it is that you started—an exercise regimen, a new employee, a team, a new church, etc. Reconnect with the anticipation and expectations you had at the beginning. Remind yourself why you started whatever it is you’re working on in the first place.
Help that new employee settle in and become the superstar you know he or she can be. Commit to new healthy habits. Make important relationships work. Approach life with an open mind and great expectations.
Do that, and you’ll do what you do better.
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