Years ago, I had a life coach who introduced me to the “Ladder of Success” model of achieving (or not). It has a lot to do with attitude. The less committed you are to a goal, the more you use indecisive words like “wish” and “might.” And if you’re using negative words like “can’t” and “won’t,” odds are you can’t and you won’t do whatever it is you want to do.
But the more committed you are, the stronger and more positive your words. You’ll say things like “can” and “will.” Better yet, you might think: “I only have one option—success.” (Not giving yourself options can be a powerful motivator.)
I’ve used this telltale model in my coaching sessions thousands of times. When someone is talking about a goal, I’ll ask if they’re going to achieve that goal. If I hear “I need to,” I know they are not all in. That kind of language makes me wonder if it’s a goal someone else has assigned to them. Their words tell me that they are not taking ownership of it.
To achieve anything significant in life, you have to want it. You need internal drive. Important things require passion. And you must be willing to act.
Recently, someone told me he wanted to get into commercial real estate. He worked in another kind of business-to-business sales but wanted to do something different. He said he was “committed” to getting into commercial real estate, and I told him I’d be on the lookout for an opportunity that might fit him.
Two months later, he checked in with me to see if I had any leads for him. I was curious about what progress he had made learning more about the commercial real estate business, if he had made any contacts on his own and what skills he was honing in preparation for making the move to a different industry. So I emailed him back and asked him what he was currently doing, from a professional-development standpoint, in order to prepare to enter that industry. He replied, “I’m going to take the exam.”
That’s code for “I’m not really doing anything right now.” Sure he has plans for the future, but that’s not real and total commitment. He’s not actually doing anything to make this happen; it’s still just a dream.
He’s stuck on the “I think I might” rung of the Ladder to Success, and that’s only halfway up to the hoped-for achievement at the top. There really was not much I could tell him other than that. He wasn’t ready for (nor had he earned the right to) any connections or leads I might be able to offer. They would have been useless because he hadn’t done anything to prepare for them.
All of us have some areas in our lives that we can improve, where we “need to” do better. Maybe we need to do “more of” something or “less of” something else. Perhaps we need to stop doing some things altogether.
The Ladder to Success is challenging, but it’s even more so if you are not committed. It takes a certain amount of fortitude to climb this ladder. Not everyone has that dedication, that perseverance. Napoleon Hill put it this way: “The ladder of success is never crowded at the top.”
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